Recipe for Happiness?

Boundless and free is the sky of Samadhi!
Bright the full moon of wisdom!
Truly is anything missing now?
Nirvana is right here, before our eyes,
This very place is the Lotus Land.
This very body, the Buddha.
Hakuin’s Song of Zazen,

- translated by Norman Waddell

The week of January 6 was an interesting week. Once again there are talks of impeachment for Ex-president Trump, that has a nice ring to it, ex-president. I’m sure our new President Joe Biden and Vice President Kamala Harris were hoping that their administration would start under far less controversial terms. Who would have ever thought that there would be an insurrection in our United States Capitol. Or that there would be 20,000 American military troops assigned to protect our United States Capital from United States citizens?

Do you remember how just a few weeks ago, New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day we were saying, “I’m so glad the year 2020 is over. It was such a terrible year!” What does that say about 2021? The corona virus pandemic is supposedly only getting worse. Our government is under attack by its own citizens. My advice to everyone is to just don’t get excited. 2020 was just a number for a year, so is 2021 and tomorrow is just another day.

Our problems come when we expect things to go a certain way. When we make goals that we feel we must accomplish. I know that there are many people who believe you have to make  goals or plan everything out. Contrary to this way of thinking I believe this is what causes the suffering and the feeling that something is the worst ever or “it sucks.” I just finished a book called The Antidote: Happiness for people who can’t stand positive thinking by Oliver Burkeman. The book is about success through failure, calm through embracing anxiety. It was recommended to me by Rev. Jon Turner. I personally agree with the author’s premise that goal oriented thinking and these positive thinking gurus and motivation speakers are actually setting you up for disappointment.

It’s a lot like people who think Buddhism is going to move you one step closer to your God  given right to the pursuit of happiness. Do I look like a dancing on air, an overly optimistic person? Most people would describe me as a somewhat scary, grumpy looking old man. However, I can tell you from the bottom of my heart, even though my face doesn’t show it. I am happy. I was happy last year and I am happy this year. No expectations and too much goal  setting only sets us up for disappointment.

Besides reading books like this and listening to Carmela, my Dharma friends and teachers like Rev. Turner. I learn a lot from my children. I really don’t know how this happened but both of my daughters turned into very caring and insightful adults. Just last week, my daughter Kacie called me and told me she has Covid. As she told me, she started crying, not because she was sick, but because she felt so bad that she thought she may have infected Carmela and I. Just so you all know, neither Carmela nor I have Covid. We had quarantined after seeing our girls just before the New Year. Taylor has also contracted Covid. She got it from visiting Kacie, but she didn’t have any serious side effects.  In fact, I just talked to her on her birthday, January 15. Even though she was self-isolated for her birthday, she was quite upbeat. She told me how this isolation has given  her a chance to finally watch Game of Thrones.  Kacie explained that since all her room mates also have Covid, they learned to play a game called “Catan”. I’m so amazed how my daughters have so far, turned into really great people. Sorry for the bragging, but I’m very proud of both of them and I have learned a lot from them.

I don’t know where it comes from, but Taylor has an extremely deep side to her nature. She has been like this ever since she was a little girl. Often, when we were driving someplace and just talking, out of the blue, she would say something amazing. For example, when she was around ten or eleven, we were talking about her teacher for the new school year. She said that ever since Kindergarten, she has never gotten the teacher that Kacie had told her would be the best teacher for that particular grade. They are three grades apart. However, every teacher she has had, had been wonderful and she feels very lucky to have been in his or her class. I asked her how she thinks this happens. She explained that it had to do with her attitude towards the teachers. She admitted that she always kind of hope that she gets the teacher Kacie had said was the best teacher. However, she has learned to not plan or expect it. In fact, not only doesn’t she get the teacher Kacie tells her is the best teacher. She usually gets the teacher that Kacie tells her is the worst teacher in that grade. I asked her, “If that’s the case, why do you think they turn out to be so good?”

She explained, “Once I find out who my teacher is, whether or not it is the teacher Kacie told me was the best teacher, I never think of the teacher as either good or bad. She said, “At least I have a teacher and a good school to go to. There are many kids who don’t have either.” Gratitude  does have a lot of positive effects. She said, “If I think of the teacher as good or bad, I could be disappointed either way. So, I remain neutral and life works out.” She explained that it never fails, if she thinks in this way, things usually turn out good. She told me that she has always been happy about how her school year turns out. I was just amazed listening to her rationale and realized how true her explanation was. And maybe this is just how I needed to look at my Life, especially in our current political climate.

One of the most famous of all Japanese Zen masters was a man named Hakuin Ekaku, also known as Hakuin Zenji (Zenji means Zen Master). His birthday is January 19, 1686 almost 340 years ago and he died January 18, 1769. He is considered the father of the modern Japanese Rinzai Zen tradition. There is a famous story about how on one occasion, a young woman in the village his temple was located in gave birth to a child out of wedlock. She told her parents that Hakuin was the father of her baby. This girl’s parents were furious and came to him with the baby. They called him all kinds of names and said that he was responsible for the baby and would have to raise it. Hakuin only said, “Is that so?” I read this story in English and this is the way it was translated, but I can imagine him rubbing his chin, nodding his head and saying, “Ahh... soo desu ka?” which can be translated as “Is that so?” These people left the baby with Hakuin and he gently and lovingly took care of the child, never complaining. After a few months, the young woman finally confessed that it was not Hakuin, but a young man in the village who was the real father. The girl’s parents immediately went to Hakuin, apologized and asked for the baby. Hakuin did not get upset, he just rubbed his chin and said, “Ahh, soo desu ka?’ He gave the baby back to the couple and went on with his life.

As we can see from this story, Hakuin had the ability to just see life as life. Allowing our life to flow just as it is and not judge it as good or bad. Taylor’s theory about teachers and Hakuin Zenji’s story; are how we open ourselves to a life of happiness, not dancing on air, giddy happy, but happiness of a real life of tranquility and equanimity.

I began this article with one of Hakuin Zenji’s famous poems called “Song of Zazen” sometimes called “In praise of Zen”. He writes, Boundless and free is the sky of Samadhi! Bright the full moon of wisdom! Truly is anything missing now? Nirvana is right here, before our eyes, this very place is the Lotus Land. This very body the Buddha.

From the mouth of my child, I have heard the insight of the great Zen master Hakuin. Maybe I should have called her Taylor Zenji. Last year was a good year, this year will be a good year, how can it not be so, with Namo Amida Butsu. Although I opened this article with a Zen Buddhist poem, I would like to close by one of our Jodo Shinshu teachers, Rev. Jitsuen Kakehashi. One of our modern masters of Jodo Shinshu, another path to happiness: true gratitude.

Many things occur in human lives.
But, whatever difficulties or sadness that we may have experienced,
if we can look upon our lives as being rare and wondrous events, then we will truly have lived. If we are able to realize this realm of gratitude,
in which we are able to live-and die-in gassho, then what else could we need?

- Rev. Jitsuen Kakehashi, Bearer of the Light

~J.K. Hirano